I happened to glance at my watch and it was already midnight. Really? [sigh] I wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball on the floor and ball my eyes out. But I didn’t have time. Besides, my son was doing the job for me. Somehow I managed to get everyone dressed in p.j.’s and slippers and buckled back into the car. Make no mistake, we weren’t pretty. Bad breath. Messy hair. Blood stains everywhere.
In the back of my mind, I was wondering, “How do you remove blood stains from white carpet?” Although my mother-in-law would never be considered meticulous, I’m sure Ms. Manners would have something to say. Mental note: add steam cleaning to our bill.
Unfamiliar places are not my cup of tea. I never liked tea anyways. Regardless, I am in a strange city completely clueless about where the nearest hospital may be. There is not a friend I can call or family member to comfort me. You see, my in-law’s are the real deal. Snow birds. They only come to Texas a few months out of the year. No one was available to hold my hand. I had no other alternative.
Confession 101: I happen to be the girl that can get lost in a parking lot.
Darkness. I could feel it creeping in. Not only in the limitless sky abounding around me, but also in the crevices inside. This world can seem so barren at times. Words can barely explain it, but at least I will try. Helpless. Overwhelmed. Frightened. Close to despair. It is a feeling we all can relate to when we don’t have the answers. When we don’t know what to do.
As I drove, I prayed shotgun prayers. The kind of prayers you fire off to God when you are utterly desperate and in a frenzy. I needed His attention now. I didn’t have the answers to how my situation would work out, but I wanted to trust that He did. God and I did some serious conversing. I would try leaning on Him now. It felt like a tug-of-war match. Trusting and leaning versus the emotions welling up within. Clutching on tightly to His steady hand nearby, I cited “When you are weak, I am strong” (1 Corinthians 12:10).
Yes, Lord, take my hand.
I pulled up to the nearest children’s hospital as the clock was striking 1:00 am. By this time, the kids had run out of adrenaline. Evidently the crankies had set in instead. I don’t even know how we all managed to find the front door. It is all a blur to me now. Sometimes moms can have octopus arms. Who knew? Or could it be an answer to prayer?